ITS MY CHOICE!!

~ Sneha

Finally have started my blog after a lot of contemplation and if you are anything like me, Confused and Indecisive, you would have also pondered a lot regarding what your first post should be. Well, a chance encounter of 20-20 biscuit advertisement in TV the other day, gave me enough fodder to contemplate and the impetus I needed. A girl was trying out a few dresses in a mall when her father asks, “Isn’t it a little short” and the mother exclaims , “Dress choti nahi Hoti, soch Hoti hai”.

No dress is indecent. Wearing clothes is a personal choice. Stop shaming our body and clothing choices. Why should people assume “Short dress= girl wants men to stare at her” ? The length of my dress is NOT a measure of my consent to have sex with you or even want you to ogle at me.

How am I responsible for the action of some “potential creep” who is going to stare at me for wearing a short dress? Please DO NOT teach your daughters to wear “Decent” clothes. When you tell us to cover ourselves and dress decently, you are damaging us and a million other girls by SHAMING us.

Instead of teaching your daughters to not wear short dresses, please teach your sons to not objectify women. Why are we constantly asked to “Cover” ourselves?

Instead, teach us that CLOTHES are NOT RESPONSIBLE for Rape, molestation and other abuse. Anyone can be sexually assaulted under any circumstances irrespective of wearing a saree or a bikini.

I remember an incident in school , when my friend’s mother was called regarding uniform’s length. The teacher tried justifying her irrational demand by stating she wanted to protect her from “Unwanted attention”. Instead of teaching boys to not view girls as sexual objects, my friend was shamed and “taught” to wear a long skirt to prevent men from staring at her. Moral Policing young girls and women has become a norm in our society! People say “Men will be men” and it’s upto us to protect ourselves by dressing “decently”. All I can say is , such regressive thinking is ingrained in our society which strips our freedom to dress as we please.

So Dear Family, Society, Well wishers , Moral Police Brigade and other Interfering busy bodies,

Next time if you tell me to dress up “Decently”, I am going to ask you to shove your Moral Policing up your **** !

Till then Goodbye friends,
Adios Amigos

Published by Sneha

Sneha is an award-winning blogger and has also been featured in Deccan Chronicle newspaper. She left her job at IBM India to venture into blogging in 2018. This blog is India's Feminist and Personal Development blog for women and focuses on self-improvement and self-acceptance. She is an introvert and at the same time an Empath, hence she finds socialising mentally exhausting. You will find her either binging on some fiction or sleeping.

88 thoughts on “ITS MY CHOICE!!”

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  36. Well said. I assume “choti” means short? 🙂
    During a trip to South-east Asia end of last year, I developed what I call the “short” index. In places such as Singapore, Penang, Thailand, many women wear shorts. Outside, on the street, in shops… Practical, given the heat, and elegant.
    The “short” index? I make the assumption that the higher the incidence of women wearing shorts in public in a given (tropical) country, the more advanced the “fight” is. 😉
    Congrats on your blog. I will be back. 🙂
    And welcome to the “Followship” of the Equinox.
    Cheers
    Brian

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

      1. Agreed. But good luck on that. It’s not even the judgement. I personally don’t care about others’ judgements. It’s the “mind your own business” thing that gets me.
        Have a great week-end.

        Liked by 1 person

    1. Moral policing others is a common norm in our society. It’s got nothing to do with Hindu or any religion as such. It’s just a sickening mentality that many people have , irrespective of their religion, to teach others how to behave decently in a society

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

      1. i heard rss guys attacking the partying people in goa years ago .and marching themselves in Chennai… all these make me feel they are more agressive than others

        Like

  43. Quite an effective description of the Moral policing crap, that’s practised by even well-read Indians today..
    Impressive First post..!!
    I look forward to read more of ur views..
    Also, I believe, a rapist shouldn’t be killed, he should be tortured, every single day..

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

  45. Sneha, first of all, thank you for starting this blog, since it’s high time we expressed our opinion regarding so-called ‘female dress code’ being a cause of any kind of crime. If we reason logically, how can some female who is a victim of a crime be at the same time the cause of the crime? The main cause of such primitive and, unfortunately, deeply-rooted attitude in the society lies in the mindset of those who have turned the things upside-down, since it suits them – they have no valid argument for their dirty deeds such as rape, molestation or harassment against women. However, the fact is that there is no justification for such acts, no matter whether a girl is wearing sari, maxi or mini skirt, or even shorts. Female persons should have and must have freedom to dress according to their own taste and without feeling any kind of guilt for doing so.
    Besides, nowadays, in the era of creativity, nobody likes uniformity, it is suffocating. And every female person should feel free to express their individuality and taste through the way she dresses.
    However, we all need far more support and understanding of the people around us and of the society in which we live, in order to change that obsolete and dangerous attitude of etiquetting women according to what they wear.

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

    1. Thank u Mira for your feedback 🙂 Yes every female should be able to express herself and dress the way she wants without fearing or being shamed

      Like

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      1. You have my whole support in that and I would just add that each woman simply has to be determined and not to give up in front of those who are trying to deprive her of this kind of freedom.

        Liked by 1 person

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